patience

not so easy these days.

so we've been formulating a plan for our son. our new provider is tabsh, the perinatologist, who will do our delivery. while we only have one more lamaze class to go, there is a good chance that we have a c-section in our future. surgery, sigh.. Tabsh is the 2nd highest paid person at ucla (after the football coach of course) which makes susan a bit suspicious, but he does come highly recommended by his patients and local nurses for being detail-oriented, smart and technically proficient. susan has seen ob's operate and has not been impressed- so we decide that while his bedside manner could be improved, being a good doc is more critical here than being kind.

next week we meet with the chief of pediatric surgery, james atkinson. we still have to develop a neonatology team. in the meantime, baby is checked for distress twice a week with a non-stress test and appears to be doing great. he's also quite active in the belly- although with a partial diaphragm we can pretty much rule out that he's had any hiccups!

the waiting game is the most difficult. 6 more weeks to go until due date- which means anytime now really. we will not know for sure how our son will do until he is born. CDH is pretty severe, and many babies die in utero or are stillborn. of those who survive, 20% die after birth with medical interventions. for babies that do well, it's a rocky course with many months of nicu management to be expected.

so his odds are good, but we recognize that the chance is also good that a child won't have this condition in the first place (<0.04%). yet he does.

given that our baby has made it this far as an active and playful boy (chewing on his umbilical cord!) we are confident that he will do well. but of course, he doesn't need his lungs just yet, so the tough part for all of us hasn't quite begun. we are still quite shocked and pained at this news, but more than ever we are excited to see him, bring him home and raise him up to be strong, diligent, patient, humble, gentle and amicable.

we do appreciate all your prayers, support, and socialization that helps keep life normal for us.